I LOST THE PLOT THIS MORNING

I lost the plot this morning and went and sat in my car. It had been one busy weekend with my kids, very little sleep had and so much on and to do. I was running on empty most of those days. There were moments throughout the weekend that I had to really back myself, having to use my voice more than I wanted to and it all felt so draining at times. Plus with this full weekend had, I am working on things that are really stretching myself into new places, new ways of showing up for myself and well things feel a little messy, yet right all at the same time with it all. And, on top of that, I had completely stopped doing the things I know that help support me in my days, and it takes me a lot and I mean a lot to really loose the plot. So this morning, I yelled, I picked up a book that was on the ground and threw it back onto the ground, I cried and I felt like I was the only one in the world that was having a shit morning (I know I probably wasn't), because when you feel like that, it always feels like you're the only one...always. So I did the best thing I could think of at the time to do...tell my kids they had to get their own lunches today, get themselves sorted today, and I went and sat in my car and waited for them to join me to do school drop off. Sometimes we just have to walk away and take ourselves out of a situation that is just not doing good for anyone. My kids were fine, amazing what they can do when they really have to...ok hmmmm their lunch box today was filled with all sorts that I wouldn't have selected, but oh well, today, they too will survive. And I too survived. As will you on days like these. I had a friend call at the right time where I got to download and vent it all out for a moment, I had another friend state last night, that 'I'm only human'... haha something I've stated to many others myself. We all need those little reminders, we all need to have that friend we can trust our vent with. Today I was reminded that my emotions are ok and safe to come through...so long as I direct them in a way that is just that. So for that I am thankful and was then able to carry on with my day looking at life differently again. Our world is filled with prettiness... I just hope that many are starting to see through many of those life filters to see there are real humans operating in the background...and that we are all just human beings doing our best. If today you had a shit day...I hope tomorrow the light shines again for you. For those who had a great day...thank you for having a great day, I hope you so enjoyed it, I really do. So, here's to been humans, that run a life that is one big beautiful, crazy mess at times.